I feel so very down. The scary thing is that I know this is simply the outskirts of depression, I know it gets so much worse. I have been there many times in that fog where you can't think and can't function and I.DO.NOT.WANT.TO.GO.BACK.
But I'm headed there....I can feel the pull of the black hole....
I feel so isolated and depressed and lonely that I am actually considering re-taking my anti-depressants (but not anti-psychotics)just to try and get out of this slump.
It's just that I thought I was well again....and as soon as I stop my meds I get sick. Every.Single.Time.
What the hell is wrong with me?????
My husband is picking up on my moods. When I go all quiet because of the depression HE goes all quiet because he doesn't know what to say. So then I feel like I'm making him sad because Im sad and it's all my fault!! Likewise when I am happy and chatty HE is happy and chatty.
His mood has always reflected mine and so I feel extremely repsonsible for how he is feeling.... I LOVE my husband and don't want to make him sad...so I try and be happy...but, right now, thats becoming harder and harder to pretend to be.
The depression is making me oh so tired and lethargic, it's so hard to be 'lively'.
Re; Weight Watchers...I have TOTALLY fallen off the bandwagon. The last 2 days have been shockers. I feel so ashamed. Trouble is, I'm an emotional eater and so have been trying to comfort myself through food.
Tomorrow is a new day right??
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